I was mystified, as my command of mandarin was very bad, and my report card was the only one among my classmates' with such a brief message with such alien looking words. Then, my dad started laughing and said it meant 'crude or clumsy.'
WTF?
During the PTA meeting my female teachers expressed concern that I wasn't 'sitting properly' (my legs a mile apart) and that I kept picking fights with boys. My parents laughed it off...then sent me to a girl's school for my secondary education. -o-
Eventually, I learned to sit with my knees together and I stopped picking fights with boys. But I guess I was never born to be all feminine and demure.
That day, I was discussing with my friend on how to remove nose hair. I said that I'd like to try waxing it...but how would we get the waxing strip up the nose?
My friend then suggested that we slather a cotton bud with wax and insert it into the nose, let it set then RRRRRRRRRRRRRIP it out!
LOL. Then it would look like a feather duster, only with nose hairs instead of feathers. Arghhhh. Then, we had a verrrrry intellectual discussion about porn genres. (Can you feel my sarcasm?) After that, I had an internet date with my beloved long-distance boyfriend.
That night, my bf's friends introduced him to this entertaining website that they liked to surf together. So, we decided to check it out for ourselves. We then went to laksaboy.org to surf for hot chicks and laugh at the clients' comments. (It's a Singaporean prostitute directory.) You guys MUST go and read the comments in the forums!
It's super hilarious. Some guys probably play too much COD or something and they kept describing their sexperience in military terms. I'll list some of the funnier quotes here:
"i cumming, buay tahan liao, shot out million of soldiers and feel she cum at the same time, my didi feel a warm layer of fluid over it"
"so tired after the battle, lie for a while den go wash up"
"My canon (sp) ready to cum anytime"
"If she continue to do that, game over for one shooter like me"
"my dick below was harden like mad. Screaming and struggling to get out of my pants"
OK, the last one wasn't really military-related but I found it funny anyway. I can imagine a cartoon dick wearing a soldier's helmet screaming "LET ME OUT GODAMMIT" and ripping the zipper apart LOL. CHARGEEEEEEEEEE!
But seriously, wtf? Why can't they just call it 'dick' or 'dong' or just plain PENIS like normal people do? MY CANNON IS READY TO FIRE! BAM!
Anyway, all those quotes were taken from the reviews of just one lady of the night. There are many more at the forums that I didn't get round to reading, but they're mostly really funny. So there you go, an idea for you to kill some time if you really have nothing to do. :D
It's obviously NSFW, so if you don't have a disgusting sense of humour like me/are really religious, DON'T GO THERE.
That said, I feel like I should find more demure and ladylike friends to talk to. But HELL NAWWWWW I enjoy talking rubbish with my friends <3 ^-^
Lately, I realised that a lot of people don't really see me as a girl. -.-
Like the time where I wrote to Garena to ask them to please change my avatar to a female one. My classmate commented that he had always thought I was a 'male' person and he found it amusing that I preferred a female avatar.
SERIOUSLY? I may not be as gentle and polite as society's image of a perfect female, but you don't have to make ominous sounding comments that seem to imply that I'm...gay? LOL, he used the word 'tomboy', but past a certain age, I believe that the word implies something else. (But I may be wrong, please don't hold it against me D:)
:I don't have anything against gay people - in fact I fully support their fight for equal rights, but PLEASE LA. Please don't think I'm gay just because I don't wear dresses and makeup to uni.
*facepalm*
Many family members and close friends have commented about the dynamics of my relationship with my boyfriend. Most of them say that 'I wear the pants,' but I don't think that's a fair thing to say. Certainly, my bf treats me like gold and would go through crazy lengths to make me happy, but in no way am I forcing him to do it. If he wants to pamper me, of course I'll let him! What reason do I have to say no? :/
I feel insulted when people say I'm the 'man of the relationship'. Are you undermining my boyfriend's masculinity, or are you trying to imply that I'm very controlling - like a dominant male? Even if I WERE the dominant one in the relationship, you don't have to say I'm the MAN of the relationship. You're just implying that only men should be in charge and that my boyfriend is not 'man enough' to be the one 'in control.'
It's ridiculous in that people assume there must be a dominant one in a relationship. Sure, it's a common thing to have one partner that has more control in the relationship, but that doesn't mean that every relationship is like that - or that it's a bad thing.
While I may not appear submissive and am not afraid to hide my opinions, (like I'm doing right now, hoho!) it doesn't mean that I automatically become the boss of my relationship just because I suit the image of the 'aggressive bitch'. Sure, my boyfriend is definitely the more romantic one - trying to get me to wear couple tees, hand making gifts for me and all. But that does NOT mean he is 'sissy' or weak.
Get over your stereotypes. Relationships exist in many forms, and when a relationship doesn't comprise of the manly hero and the damsel-in-distress, it doesn't mean there is something wrong with it.
Sam and I are not just lovers, but best friends. Best friends don't judge each other. He knows I snore like a pig hooked up to a sub-woofer, and I know his idea of a romantic date would be a walk along the beach or something cute like that. And we love it. We complement each other and I certainly don't try to restrict his freedom. He can go out with his female friends and come home late and I don't really mind. Hell, I even accompanied him to visit sex shops to find a dildo for his female friend.
We enjoy each others company, but we don't NEED it to feel happy.
Being in his presence makes me much, much happier (and milder) than I normally would be, but I don't mope and fall into depression when he's not around.
People have this twisted, Disney, Hollywood, Taylor Swift idea of love.
"I can't live without you."
"You're the only thing on my mind, I can't think about anything but your love."
"The moment I saw you, I knew we were meant to be."Rubbish. When you experience love, you'll know what it really feels like. It does not mean we have to be together all the time or go for romantic candlelit dinners or shower each other with romantic little surprises or experience fluttering heartbeats when we hear each other's voice. Geez.
Love doesn't need to justified or explained. Love begins as mysteriously as it ends. Sometimes you may be able to pinpoint the exact moment that you fell in love, but often, it just happens without you realising it. You don't need a REASON for it.
Meh, I lost my train of thought. LOL. Okay abrupt good night. :D
No comments:
Post a Comment